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Humorous

  • Look at me. Worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

    ~ S.J. Perelan 1904 - 1979 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine.

    ~ Lord Byron 1788 - 1824 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.

    ~ Mark Twain (Samuel L. Clemens) 1835 - 1910 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • If there was a way to read a woman’s mind, I am not sure I would want to. I hate shoes, shopping, gossip, and I already know I am annoying.

    ~ Unknown - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up. If you want to be appreciated, shut up.

    ~ Bill Cosby - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Oh what a tangled web do parents weave, When they think that their children are naive.

    ~ Ogden Nash 1902 - 1971 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • If the Cincinnati Reds were really the first major league baseball team, who did they play?

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • I don’t drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs.

    ~ Robert Downey, Jr. - Posted By: anonymous

     

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