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Humorous

  • It is not all butter that a cow drops

    ~ John Heywood 1497 - 1580 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

    ~ Jeff Foxworthy - Posted By: Bill C

     
  • Dad taught me everything I know. Unfortunately, he didn't teach me everything he knows.

    ~ Al Unser - Posted By: Bill C

     
  • A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • What was the best thing before sliced bread?

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

    ~ Ronald Reagan 1911 - 2004 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Look at me. Worked myself up from nothing to a state of extreme poverty.

    ~ S.J. Perelan 1904 - 1979 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     

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