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Humorous

  • I have never been jealous. Not even when my dad finished fifth grade a year before I did.

    ~ Jeff Foxworthy - Posted By: Bill C

     
  • If you're in a bad situation, don't worry, it'll change. If you're in a good situation, don't worry, it'll change.

    ~ John A Simone Sr. 1932 - 1996 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • The reason I talk to myself is that I'm the only one whose answers I accept.

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • When someone is impatient and says, "I haven't got all day," I always wonder, How can that be? How can you not have all day?

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

    ~ Bill Cosby - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • It is not all butter that a cow drops

    ~ John Heywood 1497 - 1580 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • If the Cincinnati Reds were really the first major league baseball team, who did they play?

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     

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