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Humorous

  • Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

    ~ Ronald Reagan 1911 - 2004 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • If you want to be seen, stand up. If you want to be heard, speak up. If you want to be appreciated, shut up.

    ~ Bill Cosby - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • The most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the government and I'm here to help.

    ~ Ronald Reagan 1911 - 2004 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • It doesn't make a difference what temperature a room is, it's always room temperature.

    ~ Steven Wright - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • When your feet hit the floor each morning, do you make your enemy the devil say, "Oh crap, he's up"?

    ~ Dr. Tony Evans - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Let’s have a moment of silence for all those who are stuck in traffic on their way to the gym to ride stationary bicycles.

    ~ Unknown - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking.

    ~ Bill Cosby - Posted By: anonymous

     

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