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Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.
~ Bill Cosby -
Posted By: anonymous
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.
~ Bill Cosby -
Posted By: anonymous
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I don’t drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs.
~ Robert Downey, Jr. -
Posted By: anonymous
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Why can’t problems hit us when we’re seventeen and we know everything?
~ Unknown -
Posted By: anonymous
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If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
~ Robin Williams -
Posted By: anonymous
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Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
~ Unknown -
Posted By: anonymous
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Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.
~ Drew Carey -
Posted By: anonymous
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Dad taught me everything I know. Unfortunately, he didn't teach me everything he knows.
~ Al Unser -
Posted By: Bill C