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Humorous

  • Always be sincere, even if you don't mean it.

    ~ Harry S. Truman 1884 - 1972 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • I don’t drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs.

    ~ Robert Downey, Jr. - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Is the glass half full, or half empty? It depends on whether you're pouring, or drinking.

    ~ Bill Cosby - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • I've read the last page of the Bible. It's all going to turn out all right.

    ~ Billy Graham - Posted By: Bill C

     
  • Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar.

    ~ Drew Carey - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to.

    ~ Elvis Presley 1935 - 1977 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • 'Whines' are products of sour grapes.

    ~ Unknown - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Middle age is when you’re faced with two temptations and you choose the one that will get you home at 9:30.

    ~ Ronald Reagan 1911 - 2004 Posted By: anonymous

     

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