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Humorous

  • If you speak when you’re angry, you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret.

    ~ Unknown - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Middle age is when you’re faced with two temptations and you choose the one that will get you home at 9:30.

    ~ Ronald Reagan 1911 - 2004 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • if you do a job too well, you will get stuck with it.

    ~ Unknown - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • If we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?

    ~ Steven Wright - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Let’s have a moment of silence for all those who are stuck in traffic on their way to the gym to ride stationary bicycles.

    ~ Unknown - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • I don’t drink these days. I am allergic to alcohol and narcotics. I break out in handcuffs.

    ~ Robert Downey, Jr. - Posted By: anonymous

     
  • Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?

    ~ George Carlin 1937 - 2008 Posted By: anonymous

     
  • If there was a way to read a woman’s mind, I am not sure I would want to. I hate shoes, shopping, gossip, and I already know I am annoying.

    ~ Unknown - Posted By: anonymous

     

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